Wyoming

So you know how since you were always a little kid, there was always one thing that you have always wanted to do? Well for me, its simple. I have always wanted to spend a summer working cattle in the mountains of Wyoming or Montana. Just spend some time there, while its warmer and not covered in snow, and just take in the awesomeness of some back country far, far away from civilization. Well, I get to do just that this summer!

I had a phone interview Thursday for an internship at Hyatt Ranch in Hyattville, Wyoming. Its 45 miles from the closest gas station or grocery store. In the Big Horn mountains, a cattle ranch with about 1,000 commercial Angus cows and 100 head of ranch horses!

After talking a while the guy offered me the position right on the spot. I wasn't expecting to get an offer in that phone call. Guess my resume and experience is fairly good on paper. He said what really struck him is that I really am looking to learn a lot about pasture management. I think I really have developed a passion to learn as much as I can about the cattle industry. I want to learn as much as I can about cattle management in different situations.

And he also asked me what is something that some of my employers would say is something that I need to work on. I was like 'crap!' I hate it when someone asks what is something that you would improve about yourself. I don't want to sound stupid dumb or self conceited. So I thought really quick and just told him that I have been used to only one type of operation for the majority of my life, so I am really kinda stuck in my ways of doing things. You know, its like its how I learned it, so that's what I think is the best way. But I think I want to challenge myself to learn different style of management and how to do things differently, just so I can figure what is the best for whatever situation I am in.

The internship is mostly range management: rotational grazing, intensive pasture management, field and hay irrigation. But for a couple of weeks I get to take cattle up in the mountains on horseback and stay out there with them! I can't imagine anything closer to what my dream job would be! Well, I guess it could be farther South where it doesn't get cold, but hey, this works too! I will definitely have more fun than I could ever imagine this summer.

Bad day....

If you don't laugh out loud after you read this you are = in a coma! This is even funnier when you realize it's real! Next time you have a bad day at work think of this guy.

Rob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Louisiana. He performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs.

Below is an e-mail he sent to his sister. She then sent it to radio station 103.2 on FM dial in Ft. Wayne, Indiana , who was sponsoring a worst job experience contest. Needless to say, she won.

Hi Sue,
Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother.

Last week I had a bad day at the office. I know you've been feeling down lately at work, so I thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you realize it's not so bad after all.

Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must bore you with a few technicalities of my job.

As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to the office. It's a wet suit. This time of year the water is quite cool. So what we do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel powered industrial water heater. This $20,000 piece of equipment sucks the water out of the sea. It heats it to a delightful temperature.

It then pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose. Now this sounds like a darn good plan, and I've used it several times with no complaints. What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working, is take the hose and stuff it down the back of my wet suit. This floods my whole suit with warm water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi.

Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt started to itch. So, of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse. Within a few seconds my butt started to burn. I pulled the hose out from my back, but the damage was done. In agony I realized what had happened.

The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit.

Now, since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't stick to it however, the crack of my butt was not as fortunate.

When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually grinding the jellyfish into the crack of my butt. I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the communicator. His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with five
other divers, were all laughing hysterically.

Needless to say I aborted the dive. I was instructed to make three agonizing in-water decompression stops totaling thirty-five minutes before I could reach the surface to begin my chamber dry decompression. When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass helmet.

As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it on my butt as soon as I got in the chamber.

The cream put the fire out, but I couldn't poop for two days because my butt was swollen shut.

So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how much worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your butt.

Now repeat to yourself, 'I love my job, I love my job, I love my job.'

Now whenever you have a bad day, ask yourself, is this a jellyfish bad day?

May you NEVER have a jellyfish bad day!!!